Advice for Parents : Cutting
Cutting in various forms has become a wide spread behavior
among teens, especially young girls. Any form of cutting or
self-mutilation is considered a Self-Injurious Behavior.
(SIB) SIB’s are not considered recreational, casual, or
frivolous, but rather a matter of serious concern. Most
often, self-injury is an indication that the individual is
attempting to deal with some mental stress or emotional
pain that is being caused by an underlying problem. Thus,
SIB’s are actually the person’s attempt to solve a problem.
It is wise for parents to be worried if they discover that
their child is cutting. However, when this behavior reveals
itself, an opportunity is also opened for solving the
problem at its source; and for getting the help the person
may need to learn how to deal with life stress in healthy
and productive ways.
There are professionals familiar with treating SIB’s.
Finding the best social worker or psychologist to help can
be a process. I advise parents to start by consulting with
their child’s doctor, or local hospital. He, she or they
can recommend local providers who are trained to treat
SIB’s. The professional can help to uncover underlying
stressors that may be troubling the individual by
conducting a clinical assessment. They can determine if the
cutting was a one time event or an chronic attempt to
relieve stress.
The professional will then make recommendations for a
treatment plan. In severe cases the plan may include a day
treatment program, or short term in patient stay.
In most cases the SIB can be treated on an out patient
basis.
Parents may be brought into the treatment plan as well, for
at times the stress that is causing the SIB to be used as a
coping tool, may reside within the family dynamic.
Occasionally the treater may recommend that others in the
family, often the parent couple, themselves get help.
It is important to keep an open mind where SIB’s are
concerned. When an SIB is discovered in a member of the
family, the parents may feel guilt and shame. What did we
do wrong. The diagnosis of SIB is not a criticism of the
parenting. Unfortunately, there is a certain contagion of
this behavior that exists in peer circles. In addition,
historically, forms of cutting have changed and morphed in
different sociocultural eras. What is new is how much more
we now understand re: the phenomenon as an attempt to cope
with psychic pain.
Bear in mind that finding out that your son or daughter is
cutting is an opportunity for healing on many levels. It is
not a statement about your worth as a person--or theirs.
Get help, involve yourselves in the treatment, and rejoice
when the truth is out.
